The question often posed to women during the dating period and oftentimes before the first date is planned is “Are you a submissive woman?”
The proposed purpose of this question is to determine whether or not the woman is wife material. The first problem with this question is that a woman is not to be submissive to a boyfriend, potential love interest or the like, but to her husband and husband only. The second problem with this question is that it assumes submission in marriage is elective when it is a requirement. The premise of a wife submitting to her husband has falsely become taboo in today’s society and causes more harm than benefit.
What is Submission?
Submission can be defined as a legal agreement or act of submitting something for consideration or approval, being humble, compliant, or being under the authority of another.
In practical terms, submitting to your husband would be similar to discussing if the purchase of an item is suitable with your current financial status, what course of action you should take in a difficult or uncertain situation, or simply asking your husband “What do you think of…” and taking in his opinion and acting on it.
In my own life, I have faced difficult situations and leaned on my husband for guidance. I have asked him everything from his opinion on my clothes, shoes, and hair to what we should do with our children’s schooling, our insurance policies, and our expenses. Submission is not about allowing your husband to be your god, it is about working together with God on the path to your common goals.
Why is Submission Looked Down Upon?
The act of a wife being submissive to her husband has been taken and twisted into the Transatlantic concept of slave and slave master. Those who wish to defile the institution of marriage want women to believe that they have no freedom and all responsibilities while the husband is free to do as he pleases and is not responsible for anything including the children. The desire is to dissuade women from wanting marriage and family and to strive for individualism.
Marriage is not a covenant of individualism but of oneness. Both parties have their requirements that serve the other instead of the self. Biblically, the wife is called to submit to her husband as he is the head of the wife and the husband is called to love his wife as loving his wife is directly linked to loving himself; thus the two of them become one flesh.
The world stage desires for us all to look at being a submissive wife as being a slave though studies show that married people women and mothers are happier than their non-married peers https://ifstudies.org/blog/are-married-people-still-happier. Don’t let the social media propaganda machine fool you, marriage is a blessing and provides a deep level of life long friendship.
Ephesians 5:22-33
Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives submit to their husbands in everything.
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church-for we are members of his body. “For this a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” This is a profound mystery-but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
With Love,
Mother Ocia 💕