The birth of a child can be an intense mixture of deep gratitude and anguish. Hormone levels are thrown into a rollercoaster ride as your mind is grappling with lack of sleep and a new little person in constant need of your physical and spiritual self.
Around 1 in 8 new mamas report losing themselves after birth (me included) with no idea on how to tap back into themselves and be a good mom.
From my own experience, I bleached my hair then dyed it 4 different colors in the span of 6 days! Needless to say, I threw myself into a deeper pit as I had to cut all of my hair off due to postpartum shedding and the multiple dye jobs!
I thought to myself, “If I can just get in touch with who I used to be before having children, then I could find myself again and in doing so find my happiness.” My attempts at changing my hair color did not bring me closer to myself, but drove me further away from who I used to be. One morning, as I was combing my hair, strands just began coming out! I was terribly saddened and knew that I had to cut my hair. Initially, I tried just cutting the front in a crazy backward mullet!
To say I was going through it is an understatement! The trauma of losing my hair, losing myself, and weighing in at 200 lbs had taken a toil on me and I had no idea how to help myself. I spoke to my husband and friends but they weren’t mothers and couldn’t understand. I knew that I had to start all over again by cutting my hair and giving myself grace through prayer, to be patient and love myself.
Hormones can take 3 months to 1 year to return to normal. From one mother to another, give yourself grace, give yourself love, give yourself the understanding that you have entered into the divinity of motherhood by bringing a soul from the spiritual realm into the physical and take some time to get to know the new and improved you mama.
With Love,
Mother Ocia